Will I ever "make it"

As time progresses and I get inevitably older, I'm beginning to wonder if I'll ever "make it" as they say. I always thought that when I was done with school, I would instantly have a job that paid pretty well and also made me happy. However, I have completed both an undergraduate and graduate degree, have had the same full-time job for just over a year, just started teaching speech at a local community college and have been with my soulmate for almost three years and yet, I still feel as if I'm running in place. Funny how that works.

The truth is, I've never been able to make up my mind when it comes to my career. Honestly, how can you expect me to commit to the same career choice for my whole life? While I love to learn and experience new things, I just can't picture myself in the same type of career for years on end....just strikes me as boring I suppose. Knowing this about myself, however, has pushed me to really place more focus on me...what I like and don't like, what stimulates my senses, what motivates me to keep going. While I know what interests me, who's to say that will make for a happy, successful career?

As of lately I've felt like I just can't seem to get anything right, especially at my day job. One of my faults (and I'll be the first to admit this) is that when I'm moving fast, I tend to overlook details, which in the PR world, is not a good thing at all! After hearing much criticism from my boss, I have made a very conscious effort to read through all of my work more carefully, consult with others and cross reference with outside sources such as the AP style handbook. Personally, I feel like I'm gradually becoming a more detail-oriented person...at least I felt that way up until I got the email from my boss telling me that she doesn't know what to do with me and that she is very concerned. This made me feel like a complete failure...even though I know in the grand scheme of things I'm not. What irks me even more about this situation is that aside from random comments and discussion from time to time, I have not had the chance to really sit down with her and review my time with the company. She is indeed a very busy woman and successful too, but her constantly pushing back our meetings is really starting to make me wonder if (a) I'll ever be more than a coordinator/assistant and (b) if I'll ever move up within the company.

As a result of my unhappiness, I have applied for other jobs as they pop-up, researched other career choices and even seriously considered going back to school for a second master's degree or even a Ph.D. Will running in a different direction really make things better though? I obviously chose a career in the communications realm for a reason, but those reasons have quickly faded into oblivion. People are constantly telling me that I am meant to do this, and I would be great on TV, and could definitely achieve my dream of authoring books and speaking publicly...but will I really accomplish all of those things? Yes, I realize that it's all about mind-set and determination, but I'm not gonna lie...I'm scared that I will never "make it."